Just some thoughts:
“I feel a bit like an orphan.”
A good friend of my wife’s and I wrote that in a note she recently sent to us,
This friends mother living in another state had recently died and our friend had returned home. Our friend is not married, has no children and without a spouse or children there are fewer to share memories with of her mother. Her father had also passed sometime ago after a lengthy illness and difficulties for her family and her siblings.
I understood exactly what she was saying and how she was feeling. It makes no difference how old or young one is when a parent passes and then especially the passing of the last parent. When mom and dad are gone, it is sobering.
In 1999 I was in Knoxville, Tennessee scheduled to speak at a golf conference when I got a two A.M. call, “Mr. Adamson we are sorry to be calling you but your mother just passed.” No two A.M. calls are good are they. My dad had died in 1975, twenty-four years earlier. The following morning I remember waking, laying in bed thinking and almost saying to myself, “For the first time in my life (57 years) I don’t have a father or mother living.” That’s why my friend as she said, “It feels weird.” It does. There is such an emptiness, even a bit of uneasiness.
As my friend said she’s grateful that her mother no longer is suffering but even with that realization, blessing, it is sobering to realize never again….
So to our friend we say we are sorry…and we know many others do understand your feelings.
You…..you understand also, don’t you. You wake up one day and no longer do you have a mother or father, a mom or a dad. Once you did.
============================================== August 22, 2018
Posted September 5, 2018